When things were first difficult, after Ken started his new new job we felt sure things would work out fine. We were paying our tithing and we were certain the Lord would provide. After all, HE told us to take the job with the awesome benefits and the less than awesome pay. I prayed that we would make more money. I prayed for promotions. I then prayed that our child support would be less with the birth of our baby and then it looked like the child support might end with the kids mom moving out of state. NONE of these things happened. In fact, Brady's dad stopped paying most of his child support! This whole summer I have just prayed what to do. Once I got an answer "Ye have given it no thought but to ask me". Yeah, that wasn't what I was hoping to hear. I thought and thought. I had a stupor of thought. I did not know what to do.
Notice how many times I said "I" in the above paragraph? That is cause I was managing the bills and dealing with the stress and not uttering a word of it to Ken. I was so sure that it would work out and there was no sense in two people worrying about it right? Wrong. The Lord wants us to work as partners (he told me). I told Ken how things were. I was tired of carrying it alone.
The next answer I got was a quote that many a wise man have said: Pray like it depends on God and work like it depends on you. So WE came to the conclusion that the van and it's payment need to go. It won't fit us after the next baby anyway. We have been looking at a Suburban or a large van. Neither gets great gas mileage but we kinda don't have a choice.
I applied to work at Weight Watchers. I am a lifetime member and I am within my goal range so I could work there. They have no openings at present so I figure I will keep looking for part time work. I have a paid training with WIC to train to become a breastfeeding peer councilor and that could lead to a job. I have considered a paper route and watching a child in my home. I have emailed various people about their child care ads on craigslist but none have panned out yet. Something will happen if working is what I need to do right now.
There was a small safety net account that I had prior to marrying Ken. It is the type that I had used to support myself in the early days after my divorce. I kept this small account and always looked on it as my escape hatch. If you have been though a divorce, you know, that there is a small part of you that always has a plan, just in case. So I had this small amount of money and it was only for an emergency, the kind I hope I never have to go through again. Ken suggested we use that money. It was very hard for me to decide but I am going to use my safety money. It will help in the mean time while I am working my hardest to make ends meet.
For so long I wasn't doing anything but praying. Now I am doing. We had a yard sale and made $236.00! I gave my elliptical to Play It Again Sports on consignment. That could net me another couple hundred bucks (and a cleaner garage). I am selling some of my used kids stuff and old kids movies at a consignment sale that is coming up. I probably will just spend the money I make on more kids stuff that we need, but that is ok too.
Interesting things to note: I thought I had nothing for Sara to wear in the 6-9 months clothing size and I was preparing to have to go shopping. I didn't know where the money for that was going to come from. I decided to get organized and I found things I had no idea I had. I prepared the boxes of stored things for 18 months and 2T and 3T. I have full wardrobes for Sara in those sizes, thanks to my sister and a dear friend in the ward. I have enough things for Sara to wear until the aforementioned sale happens. I will stock up on things to get us to 18 month size and I shouldn't have to spend and money. Such a miracle!
Kayla ripped out a pair of pants recently. The others in her drawer (except 2) were all the same size and clearly weren't going to work out once pants weather came back. I thought to myself, where am I going to get some pants? The thought came back: in my skinny clothes box where the two nice pair of size 6 Old Navy pants live. I may not see that size until after the next baby. It is sad for me to give them up, I do love them. Kayla needs them. Maybe I will get to buy more as a reward when I get to that size again. The way is not always easy. I would love to go buy some new ones for her. I can't right now, but at least there is a way.
I have scored tremendous deals by using coupons and hitting sales. I buy diapers for $2.49 a pack. I bought toilet paper for $1.99 for a pack of 12 double rolls (not prison grade paper either, it was Cottonelle). This week I got 14 packages of free cheese, 20 containers of free Cool Whip and 6 packs of free hot dogs. I do not pay more than .80 for packages of baby wipes.
Miraculously, our shelves, fridge and freezer seem to still have food and plenty of it. I still have a great cereal stash not as much as before but plenty. I was well stocked up on most household things from last year. It seems like every time I really need something there is a good sale and I am able to get it.
I have learned to get along without many things. I learned to make my own laundry soap, dishwasher soap and I have instructions on how to make wool dryer balls that are supposed to eliminate the need for dryer sheets (I am skeptical on this one). Did you know that you don't need to buy expensive plastic trash bags? I now get the paper sacks from my local grocery store and they fit right into my plastic trash bin. If I have to throw something away that is wet I put it in a plastic grocery sack first. I learned that vinegar works BETTER than Jet Dry in the dishwasher. I do not buy paper towels or paper plates. I have a recipe (thanks Mom) to make my own rice pilaf instead of using the box mix that is ever so handy.
I am lucky I have my own photographer too. Ken takes awesome pics of the whole family. He recently took some pics of my doula (childbirth assistant) in exchange for part of her fee for Sara's birth. Maybe some referrals might come out of that. He loves to take the pictures and he is really good. We don't know what to charge. Seems like when he has charged in the past he did the one photo shoot and that was it. I know things are tight all over but we hope somebody out there wants family pictures and would give him a try. What would you pay for two hours with your very own photographer that would take whatever pics you like, and give you a CD?
Anyway, I write this more for a record of how life is right now and a record of the way the the Lord is taking care of me. He has truly shown me the way. I have seen many miracles. Things that shouldn't have worked, have. Things that should have run/worn out long ago, are still plentiful and useful.
Many things are amazingly sweet in my life. I have a great family, everyone is healthy, we have a nice place to live, food to eat and clothes to wear. I have such happiness in motherhood right now. I adore my new little baby. I love being home. I love seeing the older kids grow and learn at school right now. I have many wonderful things to look forward to. I have peace in my life and in my heart. I have great friends.
So, I may be FAR from being wealthy, but I sure am rich.
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